Thursday, June 23, 2011

Kenny Rogers Hates Mexico

FACT: The most powerful and longest-lived hurricane of 1995 was none other than Hurricane Kenneth. The storm began on the coast of Mexico and stretched a reign of terror that nearly reach the Hawaiian islands.

The cause of this 100+MPH disaster? None other than "Hurricane" Kenneth Donald Rogers.

Need Proof? 


1. Satellite views of the twisting ball of death showed it to be primarily white...much like a certain country musician's beard and hair. Odd coincidence, huh?

2. The storm began brewing near the Mexican coast. After performing nanoseconds of research, Death to Kenny Rogers learned Rogers was angry with the Mexican government in 1995 after its refusal to lace its finest export, tequila, with the drug Gamblex™ (Side effects include: white facial hair growth, portraying a Wild West card player and uncontrollable vocal emissions loaded with poker advice). Eye witnesses claim Kenny Rogers turned himself into a hurricane in order to destroy the entire country.


3. Most concerning of all, a trail of these shirts littered the Pacific ocean wherever Hurricane Kenneth's path tread. 

2 comments:

  1. This is not even funny but pathetic. Go get a life, dude.

    ReplyDelete
  2. I'm sorry. I didn't realize Kenny's uncle read this blog.

    ReplyDelete