Friday, May 6, 2011

Kenny Rogers Brainwashed Johnny Cash

"Nobody suspects a man in silk"
FACT: Country superstar Johnny Cash (voted by Mind Control Monthly magazine as "Nashville's Most Un-Brainwashable Singer") was, in fact, once brainwashed by Kenny Rogers. The results had the gravel-voiced Cash unknowingly covering Rogers' theme song to evil.

NEED PROOF? Audio evidence smuggled into the country via a part-time heroin mule named Kip, proves without a doubt Cash was under the influence of the outlawed prescription drug Gamblex™ (Side effects include: white facial hair growth, portraying a Wild West card player and uncontrollable vocal emissions loaded with poker advice).

Rumor has it this was Rogers' revenge upon Cash for not sharing a plate of chicken wings backstage a the 1986 Country Music Awards.

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